The queer community has changed profoundly over the past few decades, and most especially since the Stonewall Riots. To be a queer male in today's sex positive society is vastly different than what it has been in history. Young gay men, these days, have a lot more freedom than what Mature Gays have held, and as a result the queer community has blossomed into a diverse, and multi-faceted community. Each facets of the queer community face their own unique challenges, and each sub-section within those communities have developed their own mechanisms, support groups, and ways to traverse the natural challenges of life. Often, mature gay men are left to fend for themselves with the majority of queer groups and government funded organisations focusing on queer youth, and young gay men. This, however, is a trend that can be seen across the world regardless of ones sexuality. Mature people, the elderly, are often left to be forgotten. The comedian, Ricky Gervais, put this serious issue in the headlines by making the suggestion that people of maturity are often neglected, and indeed forgotten, by society because people simply do not want to be reminded of their own mortality. This fear often results in mature people being cast aside, put into homes and simply forgotten. Gervais argues that we do not talk about becoming old often enough, and in this lies the arrogance of humanity. The fact is that mature individuals have a wealth of knowledge, experience and a lifetime of stories to share about getting to that point in their lives. Mature people have lived, and they have lived in ways that seem foreign and unknown to the youth of today. Being mature is a life stage which should be celebrated, it should be rejoiced and it should never be ignored. There is a special romance that exists within all long term relationships, and that’s regardless of the age difference between them.
In 2015, a non-profit gay group in South Florida, was accused of discrimination after they stated that anyone over the age of 40 would be required to pay a 'donation' to obtain entry into a pool party that the group was hosting. What's sad is that this is not an isolated occurrence. Youth, in particular with young gay men, will sometimes bizarrely use the idea of being old as an insult. If you load up the Grindr application, or any gay dating app you'll find a bunch of varying comments with ageist attitudes that will brazenly attack old trolls, 'daddies' and 'grandpas'. If you go to a gay bar, you'll often find that older gay men are ignored or treated with outright hostility. Pride parades will see a specific focus on the 'idealised' (and idolised) image of young and handsome gay men - with beauty and body image being the central components. Often, this will see older men relegated to the stands, or limited to their own 'specialised' floats. It’s a bizarre occurrence because there's a certain arrogance in the idea that whilst you're young, you're never going to get 'old', despite the idea that getting old and growing mature is a simple, and unavoidable, fact of life.George Bernard Shaw succinctly acknowledges this idea through his quote - 'Youth is wasted on the young'. By this he arguably means that being young is about exploring the world and making mistakes as you learn and grow. By the time you're no longer young, you've realised the things that you've ignored, missed out on, or simply just didn't pay attention to and by the time you acknowledge this then it's simply too late. It's especially heart breaking to see this attitude when it is the social, charity and political work of older gay men and women which have seen societal shifts in the attitudes towards the Queer Community.
It's not all doom and gloom though. There are a growing number of gay youth out there which acknowledge that age is just a number. There are people who relish the idea of being in a relationship, whether love or sexual, with an older male. These people adore the wisdom, the knowledge and the attitudes of these men and find comfort in that. Sure, that's often labelled as 'Daddy issues' from the ignorant and ageist but that stems from prejudice, and naivety and that’s certainly a culture that they're missing out on. The youth of today don't necessarily understand the challenges that queer people have had to face throughout history and it’s an important part of our cultural heritage which is being lost. On the bright side, there are a growing number of events, and organisations which celebrate older gay men and women and who have or continue to tirelessly work in trying to break down the stigma and stereotypes that are often associated with mature gay men. Put simply, to be ageist or to hold prejudices against mature men is a waste of time. The queer community already has a lot of issues to deal with from heteronormative society, without being put into a position of being against itself. When there are more important issues to be dealt with such as the legal battles with marriage equality, legislation being developed to discriminate against gay men and women, the idea of being scared of our own mortality simply seems a waste of energy.
This website is dedicated to exploring the world of mature gays and mature gay sex. In here you'll find an abundance of information regarding the unique challenges associated with being a mature gay male in today's world and that information will be regarding sexual health and lifestyles, relationships, the concept of sugar daddies, the implications of coming out as an older male as well as information regarding sexual activities. If you are a mature gay, or if you're a twink into older men, or you're just someone that loves mature gay men then this is the website for you.